Sometimes as an adult we forget about how life was when we were younger. No longer do we have the free feeling about everything. As an adult we are faced with bills, work, responsibility, balance and the list goes on. We might have moments where we remember our childhood, relax for awhile or take a vacation from the world. Since an escape doesn’t happen often we don’t relate to our children that are dealing with a different spectrum of life.

How do we relate to our children? Most of the time we tell them we don’t have time for fun or games so we leave them alone to find things to occupy their time. We work extremely long hours so we miss out on spending quality time with them. We just want to be a friend instead of a parent because things are easier that way. We use the same harsh discipline our parents gave us so we do not want to hear anything from our child (just do what I say). Maybe this is not the way.

As time as evolved our children have to deal with more pressures from inside the school and society. They are searching for love, trying to be popular (no one wants to be on the loser bench), exploring all the opportunities that come their way (good or bad), plus learning more about their bodies.

Talking about any of these subjects can be a difficult thing because as an adult things are very different. You don’t have to really care about what others think or say about you. When you have an issue, you can address it or move to another location. It is not that easy for children.

Even if we cannot relate it is important to make time to hear from them. We can be a parent and best friend if we make the time. At first depending on the relationship we have it can be difficult for our children to open up and share what is going on. If we show that we care and they can trust us it could eventually make a major difference in the communication. Also being involved with the teachers, administrators and counselors in the school could assist with finding out what is going on with our children. Another key thing is remember the relationship and feelings from when we were younger. What we wanted from our parents that we did or did not get? Going back to that place of innocence and openness could make the different as well in relating to our children.

Deciding to make a change so that our children want to share both the good and bad with us is not easy and will take time but making the effort is one of the steps that could change your relationship forever.

We need to face the reality of the times and give our children a chance to be heard. An option is to read the newspaper, contact the PTA to see what they are discussing, watch the news, secret shop the school or anything that gives you an idea of what is going on around the children. We cannot attack them but approach the discussion with open arms and an open heart.

We are miles away from them due to how we want to view the world but if we take, a moment to relate things could be so different.